Decide What To Be And Go Be It

What do you want to be when you grow up?  We have been asked this question since we were old enough to talk.  The answers have changed througout the years ranging from circus clown to a lawyer.  For some the answer is and always was simple and for some of us the answer is undecided and nags us every day of our unfullfilled life.  I'm not sure how we  find our purpose as I'm trying desperately to find mine. I've always felt as if I have a lot of skills to offer and that my purpose would come to me if I worked hard and kept my eyes open.  I've read articles about how other lucky souls have found their destiny, I've watched so much Oprah that I actually believe in AH HA Moments and living your best life.  But how?  One of my favorite Avett Brothers' songs (yes, I turn to music lyrics for life answers) says to "decide what to be and go be it."  Sounds easy.  But is isn't.  How do you decide?  And once you decide, how do you know that you'll be good at it?  Is life just a bunch of trial and error?  When I was in my early 20s I thought it was most important to experience life- before I got bogged down with age, kids, a husband, and a 9 to 5.  I figured that a smart girl like me would be savvy enough to get a dream job when the time came.  That girl did not expect to be 29 and unemployed.  I have experienced a lot that life has to offer, I've found a man that I love and that loves me back.  For some that would be enough but I'm shooting for the trifecta and looking for self fullfilling work that gives my life purpose and meaning.  Something that I love to do but that also gives me free time to live and enjoy my best life.  Listing  all this out makes me realize why I'm unemployed... I mean this job isn't going to be found on CareerBuilder.  And it is quite possible that it isn't going to be found at all, but my older self owes it to my younger self to try.  My younger self had faith in my older self and I don't want to let that free spirited, wide eyed girl down.  So while I'm here I'll document this journey of self actualization and purpose finding.  In the end, I'll either have a purpose or I'll become a really cool bank teller.  Lets decide what to be and go be it.